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THAT UNRULY CRITICAL SPIRIT
by willetta pilcher
1/26/2009 / Relationships
Has it ever invaded your life or someone you love? Personally, I don't think anyone has ever been totally immune but there are those who seem to thrive on it. I'm not talking about the occasional criticism that is justifiably needed although I suppose that most everyone seems to think their criticism is justifiable. That is why it seems to stick around so well.
In reality, most criticism would disappear if we all asked ourselves this question. "What eternal significance does this situation have?" After all, what eternal significance does it have if one of us doesn't hang the bathroom towel up exactly straight? ... or we accidentally spill something? ... or the usher didn't usher to our liking? ... or the church board didn't accept our suggestion? ... or an acquaintance didn't thank us for our gift? ... the list is simply too long to continue.
But probably the worst place of all for criticism is within our own four walls. It is so easy to pick out the faults of others and dwell on them. Granted, there are always faults that need to be corrected but how do we go about it? Is it with those condemnatory statements like ... You always... You never... You should... You shouldn't have... That is not to suggest that sloppiness is to be tolerated.
Far too often the attitude that is expressed is one of superiority or pride which comes from an attitude of "I'm better than you are or I would never do that." In reality, the tone of our voice conveys our attitude even more than our words. We may say the same words on occasion with a totally different attitude but the hearer understands what we mean just by the tone of our voice and the emphasis on certain words. Try saying this sentence with different voice inflections. "You need to go hang up your towel." Now say it without raising or lowering your voice and without any particular condemnatory emphasis on any word.
Criticism more often than not conveys arrogance, pride, superiority, disdain, disapproval, condemnation, and blame. The following excerpt is from an article written by the famous author "unknown."
In focusing on the sins of another, I was unable to see the areas in my own life that did not meet up to the standards that God is calling me to live. I was acting judgmentally and harshly, with
unforgiveness in my heart towards the offender. When confronted with my own sin, I had to admit my faults and ask for forgiveness. I could not see my own sin as I looked critically
at the sins of another with a heart filled with bitterness and anger.
"'Why do you look at the speck of sawdust in your brother's eye and pay no attention to the plank in your own eye?'" Matthew 7:3
This situation reminded me of how I treated my late wife when we were having martial problems. My focus was on her shortcomings and I was blinded to my own. Until I took my eyes off my wife and looked to Jesus could I see the areas of my life that needed attention. I had forgotten this valuable lesson and I had to be humbled by facing my own faults to have compassion and love
towards the one that now was in most need of forgiveness.
"'How can you say to your brother, "Let me take the speck out of your eye," when all the time there is a plank in your own eye? You hypocrite, first take the plank out of your own eye, and then you will see clearly to remove the speck from your brother's eye.'" Matthew 7:4-5 (End of excerpt).
I've often wondered why it is so easy to fall into the habit of criticizing others. I guess it is because it is a very efficient tool of satan so he whispers it into our spirit so that we will cause others to be discouraged or feel worthless. Oh, yes, his ideas become our words that often becomes the reason others cannot hold their head up. And more often than not it is not what we say as much as the voice tones we use to convey it.
Criticism may be very constructive if given in the right spirit. If we truly desire to see another change and grow as an individual it will come across in our voice tones. A simple prayer after instruction is also helpful and then with a hug and a smile even the sting of our remarks will be received because it was done with grace.
People who own a critical spirit are graceless people. There is no room for anyone else's opinion or action different from their own.
Willetta has spent most of her life ministering to people. In her late seventies, and a wheelchair now her mode of travel, she now ministers to people through the internet. Her webs are...
www.teachmethyways.org
www.successwithkids.org
www.theseedsower.org
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