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Locked Out By Unforgiveness
by Angela Willingham
8/31/2010 / Relationships
The other day I was on my way out for my morning walk. I try to walk at least 2 miles every morning before I go to work. This particular morning I needed to take out the garbage so instead of going out the front door I went out the door to the garage. Just as I saw the door closing I realized I did not have my keys. I had my phone. I had my pedometer. I had my MP3 player but no keys. I was in the garage, but I could not get into the house. I was locked out by a bad decision, a mistake. There was a wall/door with a locked doorknob between me and my keys. A locked door between me and my blessings, I had some coffee brewing inside, my computer was inside, my bible and other quiet time materials were all inside and I was locked out. There was a doorknob with a lock, but I did not have the key. I did not have what I needed to change my situation quickly.
I thought about that in relation to the lessons we have been doing for our life group on forgiveness and I thought how different my situation was than the one we have related to forgiving others. In the case of forgiveness the door only remains locked if we choose to keep it locked because we hold the key. I was locked out without the key and I had to call someone to come and let me in. That's interesting. I had to call someone. In the meantime I decided to go ahead and walk 3 miles while they drove over with the key. Often while we are waiting for whatever we don't even use our time wisely, using it to study our bibles, to pray and seek the Lord or to be healed. Instead we use the time to rehearse the situation, to attack the person's character or to wallow in our hurt feelings.
It is decision time. Do I stay locked out/separated from the blessings God has for me, separated from my destiny or do I use the key I have been given to unlock the door.
Pastor Warren Stewart Jr., the pastor of The Church of The Remnant, preached on his church's second anniversary on the subject of forgiveness. He asked the question, "Have you really forgiven?" He said when you have really forgiven:
1. Your Destiny will be unlocked.
2. Doors will be opened.
3. Dreams will be fulfilled.
You know you have forgiven when:
1. You don't tell anybody what the person did any more. Most of the time we tell it, not as a testimony, but in an attempt to reduce the person's credibility with others. We are trying to crucify their character. Maybe I am the only one that has ever done that.
2. You don't allow them to be afraid of you any more.
3. You don't allow them to feel guilty about what happened.
4. You allow them to save face.
One of my favorite stories in the bible is the story of Joseph found in Genesis Chapter 37-Chapter 50. In it the story of Joseph's life is told. The story tells of all the times he was mistreated and had to forgive and the final part of the story which tells of his reconciliation with his brothers. If you ever have a few minutes take the time to read it. If that is not enough for you read the story of Jesus and then check out Luke 23. He was spat on, beaten and spoken badly to and even in that He asked God to forgive them because they did not know what they were doing. I am sure you have your own story of forgiveness, when the people involved meant you no good, but God.
Everything that has happened in our lives has happened for a reason. Nothing sneaks past or surprises God, which means He already knew and He allowed it. The question is not why me, the question is what am I supposed to get out of this and God what do you want to do with or through me by allowing it to happen? What we have gone through is what God is going to use to help us to minister to someone else. Genesis 50:20:
says, 20 You intended to harm me, but God intended it all for good. He brought me to this position so I could save the lives of many people. Your situation is just like Joseph's but you have to see it that way. As long as you look at it and hold on to it as a negative, that is what it will be, it's time to turn it around on the enemy and to turn it around so that many lives can be saved, no matter how God chooses to work it out through you.
As we were completing this lesson in group I knew that God was speaking to me about a specific situation and I had to personally release something to God. I know that God has called me to ministry. I know that much of that ministry will be dealing with women that may have been hurt and we all know that hurt people hurt people. God showed me that there will be some women that will intentionally or unintentionally try to hurt me, my responsibility is to help them anyway, so the only way I will be able to do that is to forgive them before the hurt comes. Why was I locked out, because God wanted me to know that if I cannot let Him unlock the door to a forgiving heart in me, I will be locked out of the blessings He has in store for me in ministry, because the women are coming, I can either pout about the hurt or love on them anyway realizing the hurt people hurt people and these are hurting women. Remember Romans 8:28:
28 And we know that God causes everything to work together[a] for the good of those who love God and are called according to his purpose for them. We are purposed.
Pray for God to allow you to release the people whose names and situations you have been unable to forgive. Release them from captivity, because they have already moved on and you need to move on also.
Pray for God to heal your hurt places. Don't just bandage them up, pray for complete healing so that no root of insecurity, bitterness or anger will remain.
Pray for that person or situation. Pray for God's greatest blessings for their life and that they will become what God has purposed them to become and have what God purposed them to have.
Scripture Reference-
Matthew 6:14-15:
14 -15"In prayer there is a connection between what God does and what you do. You can't get forgiveness from God, for instance, without also forgiving others. If you refuse to do your part, you cut yourself off from God's part.
For further discussion contact Angela at [email protected] or write to us on the message board http://mynewtemple.org/aMessages.html
Angela Willingham, CEO New Beginnings Holistic Fitness Ministries, Inc.
www.mynewtemple.org
Copyright New Beginnings Holistic Fitness Ministries, Inc.
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