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Your Words Define You More Than Your Actions

by Greg Baker  
5/04/2010 / Relationships

We think that our actions define us more than our words. But the reality is exactly the opposite. Our actions are important, but our actions are psychologically used to verify the truth of our words and not the other way around. Be careful what you say. This article attempts to prove that your words define you more than your actions.

Take a parent who says, "Do what I say and not what I do." A child looks at the action, realizes that the words are empty and vain, and doesn't listen to what you say. Interestingly, the child will hold the words against you more than the action. If a smoker tells a child not to smoke while he is smoking, the child will hold the words against him more than the actual act of smoking.

People, even God, will use your words as a bench mark to measure your character and personality. Notice these verses:

The words you speak define who you are. You may say, but what about lying? Lies tell a lot about the character and personality of the person too. The willingness to lie about an action is something that will be held against you, once found out, than the action itself.

When our deeds and our words contradict, people usually believe that our actions are closer to the truth than the words. But people will judge you more on the words you used, either to cover up an action, to change people's perception of an action, to flat out lie about an action, or to be honest about the action. The words you allow to come out of your mouth define you in the eyes of people more than the action.

Your words give meaning to the action. If a person hauls off and hits a guy and turns around and walks away, no one knows why. No one understands. But if, after punching the guy, he declares, "You ever touch my ten year old girl again and I'll do worse!" Suddenly, the action makes sense to people. He is cheered on. The words define the action. The words define the person.

Politicians fall into this trap all the time. Many political figures can live down a mistake, but they rarely live down a lie. The very fact that you try to deceive with your mouth tells volumes about you. So yes, it is more the words you say than the deeds you perform that define you in the minds of people.

Naturally, if your words are true, you ought to let your actions verify them. That's the kicker. Our actions serve to verify our words and our words serve to define our actions, and thus ourselves. Words don't verify our actions. They define the action. So ultimately it is the words we speak that define us.

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