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Holding Hands

by Richard Steven Adams  
2/09/2010 / Relationships

It saddens me to see couples walking without holding hands or brushing against each other. I know; what a silly old man. I was discouraged to see an older, well dressed gentleman sitting alone on a bench. Was he in prayer? Was he sleeping? Is he waiting for someone to return for him when they're finished shopping? Is he here because he doesn't want to be alone at home?

I imagine there are times when each scenario is true. We are a numbers world so how many lonely people does it take to make an issue, a problem, a wound in the human spirit? What is it like to be alive in a body and not know your Creator, not know you are loved?

We all yearn for friendship. We want to know and we want to be known. We want and need to be connected. Why else would Twitter, Facebook, and Myspace be so popular? I am amazed at what some folks are willing to divulge to a world of people they won't smile at in a store.

Have you noticed that small children do not look away? Their eyes boldly search yours. Lily has a knack for finding baby eyes. When she does the two of them can have a conversation across a crowded, noisy room. At what age do we stop staring curiously and excitedly into other people's faces? Does it have something to do with a pure heart?

If I had a penny for every time I have been asked why I am mad ... Once a pastor told me I did not have the love of God in me because I rarely smile. Lily knows I smile a lot on the inside, but sometimes you have to really know someone, you have to get up close and personal to know that everything is not as it seems. You need to be friends. If my eyes greeted people like Lily's eyes do, well, folks would think I'm a stalker or worse.

I thought at sixty I would be considered harmless now, but yesterday I read about a man sixty nine who went to jail for trying to murder his sixty year old girl friend. What's that about?

Even at sixty when I say hello in a grocery store I'm usually greeted with a quick, startled look and silence. Once as Lily and I were grocery shopping I counted nine people before a little old man gave me a big smile and said hello back.

So I usually watch people from a distance, knowing full well they'd probably be willing to chat amiably with me on Facebook.

I wonder if sex is like the social media craze, you know, another attempt to be connected, to know someone, to not be alone, to be loved?

Apparently whether we are connected through the air waves or otherwise there is something missing that we all hunger and thirst for. We need friends. We need to be known and we need to know. For me there is something about seeing folks holding hands in a mall that makes me feel good.

Richard does Spiritual Direction and occasional video projects for George Fox Evangelical seminary where he received his M-Div.

http://www.yukonangelproductions.com/

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