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COPING WITH FIBROMYALGIA AND CFS
by Jeffrey Hagan by Rev. Jeff Hagan, DCE, DMin, (ThD) Introduction: Those of us with chronic illnesses, such as fibromyalgia or chronic fatigue syndrome, already have enough going against us that we certainly don't need to be making things worse for ourselves. It can be difficult NOT to though. In the Western civilization culture we live in something must be "wrong" with you if you aren't on the go 24/7. Surely you must be flawed if you're not always operating at top speed. Everyone expects us to work long hours at jobs that can be incredibly stressful, they expect us to be the perfect mate, parent, or child. They also expect us to keep a spotless home, have an immaculate yard, and wonder what is wrong if you're not "keeping up with the Joneses." If you aren't "keeping up with the Joneses" then there must be something terribly wrong with you. Shaking off this kind of thinking can be difficult, but it's essential in helping us cope with our physical ailments. Not only will it help with our ailments, but it will also help reduce stress and even give one a better sense of self worth. It does take some time and work though so one needs to be prepared for that. Following is a list of nine things that we need to be on the lookout for in our lives: One: OVER EXHERTION One needs to go slow and steady. Those of us with these conditions need to pace ourselves. We know our bodies better than anyone else and so we know our limits better than anyone else. If we do more than what our bodies can handle we are going to get worse. We are going to pay for it later so stop when your body says stop and if it's something you know will worsen your condition then avoid it altogether. Two: SELF CRITICISM We have legitimate medical conditions. Nobody knows better than you the reality of your illness, so cut yourself some slack. When you notice your mind starting to go in a negative direction stop your thoughts and turn them around. Remember that you're doing your best and your best is all that you can do. Three: ACCEPTING OTHER PEOPLE'S NEGATIVE VIEWS No matter how strong we are or how well we think we are handling our conditions, it's still going to hurt when ignorant people accuse us of being lazy, worthless, complainers, whiners, or even crazy. However, don't believe them. What they are claiming is not true. Remember that people like us that have to deal with what we deal with, go through the pain that we have to go through, are almost always stronger and more capable than those who criticize us. Four: SELF BLAME Did you ask to be afflicted with a chronic, often times debilitating, painful illness? Was it your choice to suffer through this pain, fatigue, and depression on a 24/7 basis? The answer to both of these questions is clearly "NO." Regardless of what a few uninformed, hurtful, inconsiderate people might say or think, your suffering is not your fault. Five: UNREALISTIC EXPECTATIONS This is true with both positive and negative expectations. Let's take a look at unrealistic positive expectations first. Many times we put all of our hope into a particular treatment, usually it's one that is new to us. When we do this we set ourselves up for a huge let down when it doesn't magically cure our ailments. As you are treated for your condition(s) approach it with the view that any improvement at all is a victory. We need to be realistic about our treatment as it typically needs to involve multiple approaches to make any progress. Let's move on to unrealistic negative expectations. When one tries a variety of treatments and has no success it can make them feel extremely discouraged as if nothing is ever going to give them any relief at all. Because of this, it can cause one to be hesitant to even try new treatments that might help them. Six: PUTTING YOUR NEEDS LAST Many people will put all of their energy and effort into people around them, their jobs, their volunteer activities, etc., and end up having nothing left for themselves. This doesn't work, it's a guaranteed road to burn out and worsening of one's condition. You've got to take care of yourself, make yourself a priority, or you will be less able to deal with your own suffering and you will get so drained you'll be of no use to anyone because you have nothing left to give. When coping with fibromyalgia and CFS taking care of yourself is essential. Someone might accuse you of being selfish, but with what we persistently have to deal with taking care of ourselves is simply survival. Seven: THROWING IN THE TOWEL TOO SOON When you start a new treatment of some kind, keep in mind that it can actually take a while before any improvement is noticed. If you "throw in the towel" too soon you might miss out on something that could really benefit you. Make sure and allow enough time for your body to adjust. Eight: STRESS Every single day brings stress, and having a chronic illness adds to and magnifies the results of that stress. Our symptoms are drastically exasperated by stress. It's important to find ways that help you reduce and handle stress. Nine: "WHY ME?" - It's only natural for us to want to know why we are ill? Is it in our genes? How much of it is diet? Do I have an unknown parasite? Is it something in the environment? Is God punishing me for something? Why do I have to suffer with this out of all the people in the world? Asking these kinds of questions doesn't really serve a purpose. In fact, they can steer you down a road of blame, guilt, and stress. What is far more important than "Why" is "What is happening?" and "What can I do?" These are the questions that help us find the causes of our symptoms and can lead to effective treatments. Conclusion: Don't be so hard on yourself, being afflicted with a condition was not your choice nor is it your fault. Take it easy on yourself, take it day by day, handle stress, and don't listen to the ignorant, uninformed comments and opinions of others. Do what you can, that's all you can do. Jeff Hagan is the President of True Grace Ministries and Theological Institute. Interested? www.preacherjeff45.wlxsite.com/truegracetheolgical Article Source: http://www.faithwriters.com |