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My Testimony
by Michael Gustin My name is Michael Gustin and I am 19 years old. I was born on December 29th, 1992 in Portland Oregon, to a single mother heavily addicted to hard drugs (meth, coke, acid, heroin just to name a few). For the first few months of my life I was physically neglected, going without food for exaggerated times at some points. At 3 months, I went into my first foster home for a few days to see if my mom would get better. At 5 months, I was put back into foster care again to see if my mom could do it. Again, at 15 months, the process repeated. At 3 years, a social worker came and permanently removed me from my mothers home, after recieving phone calls and emails about odd noises frequently coming from my mothers home, and I was put on medications for PTSD and other "disorders" At age 4, I was raped by a foster parent, and continously abused for about a year. My 14th and Last foster home was the only one that I ever felt really part of a foster family. At age 7, I was finally adopted and moved to Palm Springs, CA with my new family. Throughout elementary school, I was the "outcast". I had few friends and was always bullied by the cool kids, my red hair being the primary target. I was always seeing psychologists and therapists, putting me on new medications constantly, trying new "remedies" to see if they could fix the problem. In middle school came around, I started physically reacting to all the bullying that happened, and I used my height to an advantage. I was constantly getting suspended for fighting and cussing teachers out, and having no self control. I would use smaller kids, and take their things, and manipulate them to do what I wanted them to do. In about 6th or 7th grade, I smoked my first cigarette, which is right around the time suicidal ideations started coming. From that point, I went deeper into drugs, running away from my parents, leaving home to go have another drink and "numb away the pain" because things didnt go my way. I also was hospitalized into a psych ward a little under 20 times between 6 and 10th grade. My parents divorced in 2006, leaving our family with nothing but hostility and bitter memories. My parents fought, my dad was a very angry person, and I just tended to lock myself in my room, waiting for the nightmares to end. After my parents split I lived back and forth between my mom and dad's house. My dad had a new girlfriend even before my parents split so I saw her all the time. My mom had a few boyfriends, but none of them really worked out. My mom and I went on a cruise to the bahamas in 2008, and I ended up buying $296 worth of stuff, without her ever knowing, off of her credit card. When we came back I started running away again, and in february of 2009, I was visiting some friends in phoenix when I overdosed on 4200mg of antidepressants and was pronounced dead in the hospital. That was one of the scariest events of my life. After I was "revived" by the grace of God, I went back home and got into a dangerous relationship where I became to clingy, and at the end of it, ended up cutting and doing more drugs. At that point, my last option was rehab at Oak Grove Center in temecula, CA. It was then, that I was able to find ways to deal with the emotions I had, and not just use medication to bury things on top of the last 16 years of my life. I found a little spark of hope somewhere, and a bit of Jesus, and against ALL odds, graduated High School with a diploma and a 3.3 GPA. I went back home and tried college, but that didn't work too well. In february of 2011, I left to my aunts house in Pittsburgh, to hopefully pursue a 7 year long on and off relationship with a girl that I had never met in person. When I got there, it was another crazy event in my life that turned out horribly. BUT, in the midst of all that, at a church service with a preacher who I had never met, I was prophecied over that I was going to be a leader of many to Christ and salvation. I had never really understood God had been with me my entire life until that moment. I stayed with the lead pastors of a church for the next two weeks, and they were set to sending me back to Cali with my mom for 2 weeks. The band of my dreams was auditioning for a drummer, so being a musician, I couldn't pass it up. I auditioned and got in!!! I was set for life. But less than a month later, I was on the street, feeling hopeless once again. Little did I know, God was at work. Literally 3 steps away from where I was, the worship pastors at my home church were standing there. I went back to Palm Springs after being in San Diego for about a month, and tried to get my life together. All summer, I served at the church. I lived with 4 different families, and I am so grateful for every single one of them. In september I went to The Movement LA, where my director, Aaron Bradley, became the first MAN I had ever met. That man took a chance on me no one ever had, and the only reason I am able to say my life did NOT end last september, is because of him. Now, I am able to smile, I am able to love, I am able to laugh, to encourage. I have been delivered from any mental disorders that the world said I may have, which there was 7, just to clarify for the last 9 months, and for the rest of my life. I can only say Jesus is the center, He is the reason, the ONLY reason, I am breathing normally, not handicapped, or living in a box. HE is the love of my life, the answer to all of my problems, the ONLY thing I will ever need. I cannot have done anything without Him. I hope my life has encouraged you in some way. Thank you for reading, and know that you are NEVER alone Article Source: http://www.faithwriters.com |